,my ,weird] ,s*ool _?#c ,mrs4 ,lilly ,is ,silly6 ,dan ,gutman ,9 #a ,volume ,brl ,pages t#a-t#b1 p#a & #a-#eh ,pr9t ,pages #a-#ajf ,sponsor$ & ,pres5t$ by ,am]ican ,ac;n ,fund = ,bl ,*n & ,adults #ahjj ,johnson ,/reet ,baltimore1 ,m>yl& #babcj www4ac;nfund4org ,produc$ at ,na;nal ,brl ,press www4nbp4org t#a ,text copy"r ^c #bjaa by ,dan ,gutman ,publi%$ by ,h>p],coll9s ,*n's ,books1 a divi.n ( ,h>p],coll9s ,publi%]s1 #aie ,broadway1 ,new ,york1 ,,ny #ajjjg4 ,,isbn #igh-#j-#jf-#aifiba-#h www4h>p]coll9s*ildr5s4com ,to ,emma ,3t5ts #a4 ,c>e] ,"d """"""""""""""""""""" #a #b4 ,mrs4 ,lilly ,has to ,g """""" #aj #c4 ,h[ to ,grab ,"sbody's ,eyeballs """""""""""""""""""""" #ag #d4 ,di7+ ,up ,dirt """""""""""""" #cj #e4 ,ms4 ,la,grange ,is ,/range "" #cg #f4 ,! ,tru? ,ab ,mr4 ,dock] """"" #de #g4 ,&rea ,goes ,crazy """"""""""" #eb #h4 ,front-,page ,news """"""""""" #fc #i4 ,! ,scoop ( ! ,c5tury6 """"""" #ga #aj4 ,/op ! ,presses6 """""""""""" #gh #aa4 ,fre$om ( ! ,press """""""""" #hg #ab4 ,lies6 ,all ,lies6 """""""""" #ii p#a ,my ,weird] ,s*ool _?#c #a ,mrs4 ,lilly ,is ,silly6 #a ,c>e] ,"d ,my "n is ,a4,j4 & ,i hate spid]s4 ,>5't spid]s gross8 ,ye/]"d ,i 0 9 my backy>d1 & "o ( ^? 4gu/+ ?+s crawl$ up my leg4 ,i ?"\ ,i 0 gonna die6 ,"s?+ else r1lly weird happ5$ ye/]"d4 ,x 0 ,fri"d4 ,i walk$ 9to ,mr4 ------------------------------------#b ,granite's class at s*ool1 & "! 7 ?ree gr[n-ups sitt+ on *airs 9 front ( ! :itebo>d3 a fireman1 a c[boy1 & a frogman4 8,:o >e .1!y80 :isp]$ my fr ,ryan1 :o w eat any?+1 ev5 /uff t isn't food4 8,^? guys m/ h escap$ f ! loony b910 sd ,mi*ael1 :o n"e ties 8 %oes4 ,we 7 all talk+1 until ,mr4 ,granite held up 8 h& & made a p1ce sign1 : m1ns 8%ut up40 ,"s o!r gr[n-ups came 9 & sat 9 front ( ! :itebo>d4 #a 8,gd morn+1 "ey"o10 sd ,mr4 a#b ---------------------------------#c-#d ,granite4 8,dr4 ,c>bles1 ! presid5t ( ! ,bo>d ( ,$uca;n1 decid$ t td wd 2 ,c>e] ,"d at ,ella ,m5try ,s*ool4 ,s ,i 9vit$ a few ( my frs to come 9 & tell y ab _! jobs4 ,maybe ? w help y decide :at .1y want to 2 :5 y gr[ up40 8,i alr "k :at .1,i'm go+ to be10 ,i sd4 8,a pro skatebo>d]40 8,me too10 sd ,alexia1 :o is a girl b is cool anyway4 8,i want to 2 a vet]9>ian10 sd ,&rea ,"y1 ? annoy+ girl ) curly br[n hair t ,i hate4 8,y want to gr[ up & n eat m1t80 ,i ask$4 ------------------------------------#e 8,t's a .1veget>ian1 ,>lo60 ,&rea sd1 roll+ h] eyes4 ,%e calls me by my r1l "n 2c %e "ks ,i don't l x4 ,:y c't a truck full ( veget>ians fall on ,&rea's h1d8 ,! frogman /ood up f/4 ,he _h a mask on 8 face & flipp]s on 8 feet4 8,i'm a scuba div]10 he told a#e u4 8,i fe$ ! fi% at ! aqu>ium blah blah blah40 ,he told u all ab h[ he fe$s ! fi%4 ,!n ! c[boy /ood up4 8,i milk ! c[s & groom ! horses & blah blah blah10 he sd4 ,he told u :at x 0 l to "w on a ran*4 ,!n "s o!r guy /ood up4 8,i'm an ext]m9ator10 he sd4 8,my job ------------------------------------#f is to kill bugs & blah blah blah40 ,gr[n-ups sure h weird jobs6 8,\r next gue/ is a special surprise10 ,mr4 ,granite told u4 8,pl1se welcome 444 pr(es.nal skatebo>d] ,tony ,eagle60 ,w[6 ,tony ,eagle is .1fam\s6 ,he's be5 on ,,tv4 ,me & ! guys & ,alexia />t$ clapp+ & %\t+4 ,tony ,eagle came roll+ 9to ! room4 ,b he didn't come roll+ 9 on a skatebo>d4 ,he came roll+ 9 on a :eel*air6 #c 8,:at happ5$ to .1y80 ,i ask$4 a#f 8,i broke e b"o 9 my body10 ,tony told u4 8,y m/ h be5 "w+ on a r1lly awe"s new trick1 huh80 ask$ ------------------------------------#g ,neil1 :o we call ! nude kid ev5 ?\< he we>s clo!s4 8,no40 ------------------------------------#h 8,w]e y try+ to jump ov] a c>80 ,i ask$4 8,t is cool60 8,no40 8,:at happ5$80 ask$ ,ryan4 8,i 444 uh 444 ran 9to a door10 sd ,tony ,eagle4 ,\*6 ,runn+ 9to doors hurts4 ,maybe ,i don't want to 2 a pro skatebo>d] af all4 ,a bun* ( o!r gr[n-ups told u ab _! jobs4 ,a lawy] told u t he >gues ) p all "d4 ,a nurse told u t %e has to cl1n up blood & guts & puke at a hospital4 ,! fireman told u t "o "t a burn+ build+ collaps$ :ile he 0 9 x4 ,& ,i ?"\ go+ to .1s*ool 0 no #i fun6 ,af ,c>e] ,"d1 ,i'm n sure ,i want to gr[ up to 2 a gr[n-up at .1all4 ,i ?9k ,i'll j /ay a kid = ! re/ ( my life4 ,:5 !y 7 all d"o1 ! gr[n-ups />t$ to l1ve4 ,b y'll n"e 2lieve :o ran 9to ! door at t mo;t4 ,nobody6 ,if y ran 9to a door1 y cd 5d up 9 a :eel*air l ,tony ,eagle4 ,b y'll n"e 2lieve :o ran 9to ! .1doorway4 ,i'm n gonna tell y4 ,okay1 okay1 ,i'll tell y6 ,b y h to r1d ! next *apt]4 ,s nah-nah-nah boo-boo on y6 -----------------------------------#aj #b ,mrs4 ,lilly ,has to ,g ,x 0 a lady :o came runn+ 9to \r classroom4 ,%e 0 we>+ an old-"t man's hat & a tr5* coat4"9 ,"! 0 a cam]a >.d h] neck & a notepad 9 h] h&4 ,%e #e 0 all \ ( br1?4 a#aj "333333 "9,i guess a tr5* coat is a coat t y we> 9 a tr5*4 -----------------------------------#aa 8,is ,c>e] ,"d ov]80 %e ask$4 8,mrs4 ,lilly60 sd ,mr4 ,granite4 ,i recogniz$ ,mrs4 ,lilly4 ,%e's a report] = \r local pap]1 ! .7,news ,tribune ,bullet9 ,9quir].'4 ,%e wrote an >ticle ab \r s*ool :5 a squirrel ate "? ! p[] l9es & all ! lin h[ !y make ! newspap]80 8,yes60 sd all ! girls except = ,alexia4 8,no60 sd all ! boys & ,alexia4 8,maybe y c come back ano!r a#ae "t to %[ ! class h[ to make a newspap]10 su7e/$ ,mr4 ,granite4 8,i h a bett] idea10 sd ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,:5 ,i come back1 ! kids & ,i c make a r1l newspap] .1tgr60 8,t's a .1wond];l idea60 sd ,mr4 ,granite4 8,wd y kids l to make a r1l newspap] ) ,mrs4 ,lilly80 8,yes60 yell$ all ! girls except = ,alexia4 8,no60 yell$ all ! boys & ,alexia4 -----------------------------------#af 8,i c see ! h1dl9e n[10 sd ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,8,,,kids make newspap]6,',0 ,i love x6 ,b = n[1 ,i've got to g40 8,d y h to g1 or d y h to .1g80 ,i ask$4 8,i h to g10 %e repli$1 8& x's an em]g5cy60 ,i / didn't "k if ,mrs4 ,lilly _h to g1 or if %e _h to .1g4 ,9 any case1 %e w5t runn+ \ ( ! room4 ,mrs4 ,lilly is silly4 #i #c #ag ,h[ to ,grab ,"sbody's ,eyeballs 8,okay10 ,mr4 ,granite sd af ,mrs4 ,lilly 0 g"o1 8turn to page tw5ty-?ree 9 yr ma? books40 ,we all took \ \r ma? books & turn$ to page tw5ty-?ree4 ,b y'll n"e 2lieve :o walk$ 9to ! -----------------------------------#ah doorway a few m9utes lat]4 ,x 0 ,mrs4 ,lilly ag6 8,mrs4 ,lilly6 ,i ?"\ y sd y _h to g10 sd ,mr4 ,granite4 8,to :at d we [e ! pl1sure ( yr company .1n[80 "<,t's gr[n-up talk = 8,:at >e .1y -----------------------------------#ai do+ "h80"> 8,i did h to g10 ,mrs4 ,lilly repli$4 8,& ,i w5t4 ,n[ ,i'm back40 8,i'm glad a tree didn't fall on y10 ,i told h]4 8,b ,i ?"\ y 7 go+ to come back ano!r .1"d10 sd ,mr4 ,granite4 8,we're />t+ \r ma? lesson n[40 8,ma?1 eh80 ,mrs4 ,lilly sd4 a#ai 8,well1 if we pr9t up a newspap] ) t5 pages 9 x & "! >e five >ticles on ea* page1 h[ _m >ticles c we fit 9to ! newspap]80 ,"s kids rais$ _! h&s4 ,mrs4 ,lilly call$ on ,ll ,miss ,i-,"k-,"ey?+1 ( c\rse4 -----------------------------------#bj 8,fifty60 sd ,&rea4 8,2c five t5s make fifty40 8,correct60 sd ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,see1 we j did a ma? lesson4 ,n[ let's write "s ( ^? >ticles = \r newspap]40 8,yay60 we all %\t$4 8,i give up10 sd ,mr4 ,granite4 8,if y ne$ me1 ,i'll 2 9 ! t1*]s' l\nge40 ,he w5t to ! t1*]s' l\nge1 : is a secret room ": ! t1*]s g to h hot tub "pies4 ,mrs4 ,lilly took (f h] tr5* coat1 & we all ga!r$ >.d h] on ! floor4 8,:at %d we write ab80 ask$ ,emily4 8,write ab :at y "k10 sd ,mrs4 #aa ,lilly4 8,y "k a lot ab yr #ba s*ool4 ,h[ ab we make a s*ool newspap]8 ,we c call x 444 .7,! ,ella ,m5try ,s5try.'4 ,y c all write >ticles = x40 8,yay60 "eybody yell$4 ,ll ,miss ,annoy+ 0 all excit$1 & %e 0 wav+ h] h& >.d l x 0 on fire4 8,i alr wrote "s?+ at home10 ,&rea ann\nc$1 pull+ "s pap]s \ ( h] desk4 8,maybe we c use x 9 \r newspap]40 ,u<4 ,cd %e possibly 2 m bor+8 ,only ,&rea wd write an >ticle = a newspap] 2f %e ev5 knew we 7 go+ to .1make a newspap]4 ,%e held -----------------------------------#bb up h] dumb >ticle s we cd all see x4 ,! f/ page sd3 ,,,i love ella m5try s*ool,' ,by ,br5da ,my]s 8,:o's ,br5da ,my]s80 ask$ ,alexia4 8,t's my p5 "n10 sd ,&rea4 8,y "n yr p5s80 ,i sd4 8,t's weird40 ,&rea roll$ h] eyes & !n %e a#bb r1d h] >ticle \ l\d4 ,x 0 all ab h[ \r s*ool 0 built 9 #aifa1 & x 0 "nd af a t1*] "nd ,ella ,m5try4 ,!n x w5t on to talk ab a bun* ( o!r r1lly bor+ /uff1 l ! hi/ory ( ! s*ool4 ,i ?"\ ,i 0 gonna die f bor$om4 -----------------------------------#bc ,:5 ! torture 0 ov]1 ,&rea look$ up at ,mrs4 ,lilly & wait$ = h] to say h[ wond];l t dumb >ticle was4 ,:at a br[nnos]6 ,b t's :5 ! mo/ amaz+ ?+ 9 ! hi/ory ( ! _w happ5$4 -----------------------------------#bd ,mrs4 ,lilly dropp$ ,&rea's >ticle 9to ! g>bage c6 8,t 0 t]rible10 %e sd4 8,oh1 snap60 sd ,ryan4 ,well1 ,&rea look$ l %e 0 go+ to .1explode6 ,i don't ?9k a gr[n-up .1"e sd any?+ l .1t to h]4 ,ha-ha6 ,nah-nah-nah boo-boo on ,&rea6 ,9 h] face6 -----------------------------------#be ,x 0 ! grte/ mo;t ( my life4 #ac 8.7,! ,ella ,m5try ,s5try.' a#be ne$s to r1* \ & grab ! r1d]'s eyeballs10 ,mrs4 ,lilly told u4 8,\*60 ,i sd4 8,i don't want anybody t\*+ my eyeballs40 8,:at ,i m1n is t newspap]s h to compete ) ! 9t]net1 ,,tv1 & video games10 ,mrs4 ,lilly told u4 8,\r pap] ne$s to h .1excit+ /ories40 8,i ?"\ yr >ticle 0 wond];l1 ,&rea10 :isp]$ ,emily1 :o loves "ey?+ ,&rea does4 8,b \r s*ool is r1lly bor+10 sd ,mi*ael4 8,i don't ?9k we c make an excit+ newspap] t w grab -----------------------------------#bf p's eyeballs40 8,no?+ 9t]e/+ "e happ5s "h10 sd ,ryan4 8,y1h10 sd ,neil ! nude kid1 8? s*ool is bor+4 ,we don't h any gd /ories to tell40 8,sure y d60 ,mrs4 ,lilly sd4 8,y've j got to dig = !m40 ,at t mo;t ,mr4 ,klutz came 9to ! classroom4 ,he's \r pr9cipal1 & a#bf he has no hair at all4 ,i m1n n"o4 ,8 h1d looks l a liri$4 ,my hair />t$ fall+ \ >.d ! "t my wife & ,i got divorc$4 ,& by ! "t ,i got m>ri$ ag1 ,i 0 totally bald40 ,mr4 ,klutz told u "s m /uff ab -----------------------------------#bi ! gd old "ds :5 he _h hair & !n he sd he _h to g4 8,d y h to g10 ,i ask$1 8or d y h to .1g80 8,i h to g10 he sd4 ,mr4 ,klutz left1 & ,mrs4 ,lilly w5t ov] to ! :itebo>d4 8,s we're go+ to write an >ticle ab ,mr4 ,klutz's hair80 ask$ ,alexia4 8,no1 ,i h ano!r idea10 sd ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,let me %[ y h[ ,i wd h&le ? 9t]view4 ,x's a grt human 9t]e/ /ory4 ,i c see ! h1dl9e n[4 4440 ,& !n %e wrote ? on ! :itebo>d1 ) big lrs 444 ,,,mr4 klutz has two wives6,' #d #cj ,di7+ ,up ,dirt 8,mr4 ,klutz has two wives80 ask$ ,ryan4 8,sure60 ,mrs4 ,lilly sd4 8,he _h "o wife & !n he got divorc$ & m>ri$ "sbody else4 ,t's two wives40 8,b he didn't h two wives at ! -----------------------------------#ca same "t10 ,&rea po9t$ \4 8,i n"e sd he did10 sd ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,n[1 :at ab ! .1o!r gr[n-ups at ,ella ,m5try ,s*ool8 ,we ne$ to dig up "s dirt40 8,y %d g \ to ! playgr.d10 ,i su7e/$4 8,"!'s pl5ty ( dirt "!40 8,n .1t k9d ( dirt60 sd ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,we ne$ "s hot /ories t w grab p's eyeballs4 ,alexia & ,emily1 ,i want y to "w z a t1m4 ,g sn1k 9to ! t1*]s' l\nge4 ,see :at .1r1lly goes on 9 "!40 8,"r1 ,*ief60 sd ,emily4 8,ryan & ,mi*ael1 y're a t1m1 #ag too10 sd ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,g "? a#ca all ! -----------------------------------#cb g>bage cans 9 ! s*ool4 ,f9d \ if any t1*]s ?r[ away any?+ 9t]e/+40 8,we're on x60 sd ,mi*ael4 8,neil10 sd ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,i want y to put a tail on ,mr4 ,macky1 ! r1d+ speciali/40 8,:y80 ask$ ,neil4 8,p don't h tails40 8,n .1t k9d ( a tail60 ,mrs4 ,lilly sd4 8,i want y to foll[ ,mr4 ,macky >.d4 ,see ": he goes4 ,see :o he talks to4 ,!n report back to u40 8,got x1 ,*ief60 sd ,neil4 8,a4,j4 & ,&rea1 y're a t1m10 sd ,mrs4 ,lilly4 -----------------------------------#cc 8.1,oooooh60 ,ryan sd4 8,a4,j4 & ,&rea >e a t1m4 ,!y m/ 2 9 .1love60 8,:5 >e y gonna get m>ri$80 ask$ ,mi*ael4 ,if ^? guys w]5't my be/ frs1 ,i wd hate !m4 8,i want y to 9t]view z _m a#cc t1*]s z y c10 ,mrs4 ,lilly told ,&rea & me4 8,br+ back "s scoops40 8,:y d y ne$ scoops80 ,i ask$4 8,did yr dog g to ! ba?room80 8,n .1^? k9d ( scoops60 ,mrs4 ,lilly %\t$4 8,scoops >e /ories1 ,>lo10 ,&rea sd1 roll+ h] eyes4 8,i knew t10 ,i li$4 -----------------------------------#cd 8,dig up "s secrets10 sd ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,get "s 9=ma;n nobody else "ks4 ,y all h "o h\r4 ,af t1 report back "h1 & we'll put .7,! ,ella ,m5try ,s5try.' tgr on ! comput]4 ,i c't wait to see h[ y make \40 8,ewwwwwwwww1 4gu/+60 we all %\t$4 8,mrs4 ,lilly sd ,8make \,060 8,:at if we don't f9d any secrets80 ,mi*ael ask$4 8,"eybody has secrets10 ,mrs4 ,lilly sd4 8,g \ "! & f9d !m4 ,ask ! t1*]s to tell y "s?+ ab !mvs t nobody "ks4 ,& make sure to get yr facts "r4 #ai ,t's v important40 a#cd -------------------------------#ce-#cf 8,b,-0 8,no buts6 ,g6 ,g6 ,g60 ,we all gi7l$ 2c ,mrs4 ,lilly sd 8b10 : s.ds j l 8butt0 except t x only has "o ;t4 ,b 8butt0 is a lot funni] ?an 8b40 ,nobody "ks :y4 -----------------------------------#cg #e ,ms4 ,la,grange ,is ,/range ,&rea gra2$ h] notebook & a p5cil4 ,!n we w5t sl9k+ d[n ! hallway l secret ag5ts4 ,x 0 cool4 8,isn't ? excit+1 ,>lo80 sd ,&rea4 8,we're l r1l 9ve/igative report]s4 ,i hope we get "s gd 9t]views60 -----------------------------------#ch 8,i h an idea10 ,i sd4 8,we %d sn1k \ ( s*ool & g home4 ,!n ,i cd play video games = ! re/ ( ! "d4 ,nobody wd "e "k we 7 g"o40 8.1,%hhhhhhh60 ,&rea sd4 8,i ?9k ,i he> "sbody4 ,hold my h&40 a#ch 8,i'm n hold+ h&s ) y10 ,i told h]4 8,report]s don't hold h&s40 -----------------------------------#ci 8,!y d if !y're 9 .1love10 %e repli$4 ,u<1 4gu/+6 ,i ?"\ ,i 0 gonna ?r[ up4 ,we snuck >.d ! corn]1 ": ,i spott$ an op5 door4 8,! vomitorium60 we bo? sd4 ,! vomitorium is ": we eat lun*4 ,x us$ to 2 call$ ! cafetorium1 b !n "o "d "s kid ?rew up 9 "!1 & x's be5 ! vomitorium "e s9ce4 ,! only p]son 9 ! vomitorium 0 \r lun* lady1 ,ms4 ,la,grange4 ,%e's f ,fr.e1 : is ? c.try ": !y eat frogs' legs4 8,bonj\r60 sd ,ms4 ,la,grange4 "<,t's ,fr.e talk = 8hello40"> 8,lun* w n 2 -----------------------------------#dj r1dy = an h\r4 ,:at c ,i d = y kids80 ,&rea got h] pad & p5cil r1dy #ba s %e cd take notes4 a#dj 8,we're "h to dig up "s dirt10 ,i told ,ms4 ,la,grange4 -----------------------------------#da 8,well10 %e sd1 8"!'s dirt 9 ! fl[]pot on ! w9d[sill40 8,n .1t k9d ( dirt60 ,&rea told h]4 8,we ne$ a scoop40 ,ms4 ,la,grange pick$ a scoop \ ( ! s9k4 8,"h10 %e sd1 8y c use ? scoop to dig up "s dirt f ! fl[]pot40 8,n .1t k9d ( scoop60 sd ,&rea4 8,we're mak+ a s*ool newspap]1 s we ne$ to 9t]view y10 ,i told ,ms4 ,la,grange4 8,tell u "s?+ ab yrf t nobody "ks40 8,hmmmm10 ,ms4 ,la,grange said4"9 8,:5 "333333 "9,gr[n-ups alw say 8,hmmmm0 :5 !y're ?9k+4 ,nobody "ks :y4 -----------------------------------#db ,i 0 a ll girl gr[+ up 9 ,fr.e1 my p>5ts [n$ a re/aurant 4440 ,ms4 ,la,grange />t$ tell+ u a#db all ab h] p>5ts' re/aurant4 ,x s.d$ l x 0 go+ to 2 bor+4 ,b ,ll ,miss ,p]fect 0 writ+ d[n e ^w 9 h] notebook anyway4 8,um-hmm10 ,&rea sd4 8,g on40 8,well1 "o "d10 ,ms4 ,la,grange sd1 8,i 0 9 ! re/aurant eat+ my lun*4 ,x 0 s\p4 ,a nice tomato s\p ) ll crack]s blah blah blah 4440 ,u<4 ,i ?"\ ,i 0 gonna die4 ,:o c>$ :at k9d ( s\p x was8 ,? 0 ! mo/ bor+ /ory 9 ! hi/ory ( ! _w4 ,we 7 wa/+ \r "t -----------------------------------#dc 9t]view+ ,ms4 ,la,grange4 8,s ,i 0 dr9k+ my s\p10 %e 3t9u$1 8:5 ,i saw ! reflec;n ( a man's face 9 ! s\p b[l40 8,s80 ,i ask$1 bor$4 8,& d y "k ^: reflec;n ,i saw 9 ! s\p80 %e ask$4 8,:o80 ask$ ,&rea4 8,elvis ,presley60 ,ms4 ,la,grange sd4 8,he walk$ "r 9to \r #bc re/aurant & ate lun* "!60 a#dc 8,,w[10 we sd1 : is 8,,mom0 upside d[n4 -----------------------------------#dd 8,n[ .1t's a scoop60 ,&rea sd4 8,let's g tell ,mrs4 ,lilly60 ,we ran all ! way back to \r classroom4 ,mrs4 ,lilly 0 sitt+ at ! comput]4 ,%e _h alr typ$ ,,,! ella m5try s5try,' on ! scre51 & 2l x 7 blank spaces ": ! >ticles wd g4 ,we told h] ab \r 9t]view ) ,ms4 ,la,grange4 8,t's grt60 %e sd4 8,? cd 2 \r l1d /ory60 ,!n %e typ$ ? \ 9 big lrs3 ,,,lun* lady sees lo80 ,&rea sd4 8,? is go+ to make a grt >ticle a#di = ! pap]60 8,no x won't10 ,i sd4 8,t /ory is bor+4 ,i h a bett] /ory to write40 ,:5 we got to \r classroom1 ,mrs4 ,lilly 0 at ! comput] "w+ on .7,! ,ella ,m5try ,s5try.'4 ,i told h] we _h ano!r big scoop1 & %e sd x wd 2 okay if ,i typ$ ! h1dl9e on ! comput] by myf4 ,s ,i typ$ ?3 ,,,mr4 dock] b1ts 8 wife6,' 8,y c't write t1 ,>lo60 ,&rea sd4 8,:at a horrible ?+ to say6 ,mr4 -----------------------------------#ej ,dock] doesn't b1t 8 wife60 8,he does too60 ,i sd4 8,!y 7 9 a race4 ,he won1 & %e came 9 ?ird place4 ,s he b1t h]4 ,x's "r "! 9 yr notes40 8,mrs4 ,lilly80 ask$ ,&rea4 8,:at d .1y say80 ,&rea look$ at ,mrs4 ,lilly4 ,mrs4 ,lilly look$ at me4 ,i look$ at ,mrs4 ,lilly4 ,mrs4 ,lilly look$ at #bg ,&rea4 ,we 7 all look+ at ea* a#ej o!r4 ,y cd h he>d a p9 drop1 if any ( u _h be5 hold+ p9s4 ,b :y wd anybody br+ p9s to s*ool8 ,t wd 2 weird4 8,? is front-page news60 ,mrs4 ,lilly f9ally sd4 8,grt job1 ,a4,j46 ,y >e a natural report]40 -----------------------------------#ea 8,?ank y60 ,i sd4 ,i look$ at ,&rea & /uck my t;gue \4 -----------------------------------#eb #g ,&rea ,goes ,crazy ,:5 ,mrs4 ,lilly told me ,i 0 a natural report]1 ,&rea's face got all r$4 ,i don't ?9k a gr[n-up "e sd t ano!r kid 0 bett] ?an h] at .1any?+4 ,x look$ l ,&rea want$ to yell & scr1m at ,mrs4 ,lilly4 ,b ( c\rse ,ll -----------------------------------#ec ,miss ,br[nnos] wd n"e say any?+ m1n to a gr[n-up1 s ,&rea j /ood "! ) h] eyes bu7+ \4 ,i ?"\ %e 0 go+ to explode6 ,x 0 ! grte/ mo;t ( my a#ec life4 8,n[ g \ "! & dig up "s m dirt10 ,mrs4 ,lilly told u4 8,we only h half an h\r left40 ,&rea & ,i w5t \ 9to ! hallway ag4 ,%e 0 all mad1 /omp+ >.d & mak+ h] be/ m1n face at me4 8,any?+ y c d1 ,i c d bett]1 ,>lo60 %e sd4 8,i'll %[ .1y :o's a natural report]60 8,%ee%10 ,i sd1 8take a *ill pill40 ,we w&]$ >.d ! hallways = -----------------------------------#ed a :ile until we saw ,mrs4 ,yonk]s 9 ! comput] room4 ,%e 0 by h]f1 s x m/ h be5 h] free p]iod4 ,&rea m>*$ ov] to ,mrs4 ,yonk]s & ask$ h] to tell u ! mo/ excit+ ?+ t "e happ5$ to h]4 8,oh1 ,i'm n a v excit+ p]son1 ,i'm sorry to say10 sd ,mrs4 ,yonk]s4 8,i take my son to swimm+ practice1 ,i g groc]y %opp+1 & on ! week5d we h b>becues 9 ! backy>d4 4440 #bi 8,y say y h b>becues 9 yr a#ed backy>d80 ask$ ,&rea1 writ+ d[n e ^w4 8,sure1 alm e week10 sd ,mrs4 ,yonk]s4 8,x's fun40 -----------------------------------#ee 8,grt60 ,&rea sd4 8,let's g1 ,>lo40 ,hav+ a b>becue 9 ! backy>d didn't s.d l m* ( a scoop to me4 ,b :5 we w5t \ 9to ! hallway1 ,&rea wrote ? 9 h] notebook3 ,,,mrs4 yonk]s sets fires = fun6,' 8,%e doesn't set fires = fun10 ,i told ,&rea4 8,t's :at %e sd60 ,&rea 9si/$4 8,i h x "r "h 9 my notes6 ,y're n ! .1only natural report] >.d "h1 ,>lo4 ,i c dig up ! dirt1 too4 ,? is a grt human 9t]e/ /ory40 8,:at"e10 ,i sd4 ,we saw \r vice pr9cipal1 ,mrs4 ,jafee1 -----------------------------------#ef com+ d[n ! hall1 & ,&rea ran ov] to h]4 a#ef 8,we're writ+ >ticles = ! pap]10 %e sd4 8,mrs4 ,jafee1 :at's ! wor/ ?+ t "e happ5$ to y80 8,hmmm10 sd ,mrs4 ,jafee4 8,i _h a sad *ildhood4 ,my family 0 v poor4 ,"! 7 ev5 rats 9 \r h\se4 ,x 0 s bad1 we _h to use poison to get rid ( !m40 8,grt60 sd ,&rea1 writ+ 9 h] notebook4 ,:5 ,mrs4 ,jafee left1 ,i look$ at :at ,&rea _h writt53 ,,,vice pr9cipal liv$ ) rats6,' ,b !n ,&rea cross$ t \ ) h] p5cil4 8,i h a bett] idea10 %e sd4 ,& !n -----------------------------------#eg %e wrote ?3 ,,,vice pr9cipal poison$ def5se.s animals6,' ,&rea _h ? wild look 9 h] eyes l crazy p d 9 ! movies4 ,x 0 sc>y6 ,t's :5 ! s*ool secur;y gu>d1 ,(fic] #ca ,sp;e1 came ov]4 a#eg 8,>e y kids suppos$ to 2 roam+ >.d 9 ! halls80 he ask$ u4 8,sure10 ,i told hm4 8,we're writ+ >ticles = ! s*ool pap]40 8,yes10 ,&rea sd4 8,secur;y gu>ds m/ l1d v dang]\s lives4 ,c y tell u ab a "t y b1t up a bad guy1 or "s?+ excit+ l t80 8,no1 ,i n"e b1t up any bad guys10 sd ,(fic] ,sp;e4 8,b 2f ,i got ? job1 -----------------------------------#eh ,i 0 a secur;y gu>d 9 a prison4 ,t wasn't m* fun40 8,h[ l;g did y "w 9 ! prison80 ,i ask$4 8,oh1 ab five ye>s40 ,&rea got t crazy look 9 h] eyes ag :ile %e 0 writ+ notes4 ,x 0 alm l ! "t ,i hypnotiz$ h] & %e climb$ up on ! ro(4 ,:5 ,(fic] ,sp;e walk$ away1 %e %[$ me :at %e _h writt5 9 h] notebook3 ,,,(fic] sp;e 0 9 jail = five ye>s6,' a#eh 8,he 0 n60 ,i told ,&rea4 8,he 0 too60 %e 9si/$4 8,i h x "r "h 9 my notes60 -----------------------------------#ei ,we w5t back & =? l t = a :ile4 ,&rea 0 gett+ \ ( 3trol6 ,af t %e m>*$ up to 9t]view ,ms4 ,coco1 \r gift$ & tal5t$ t1*]4 ,ms4 ,coco told u t h] c> broke d[n ! o!r "d1 & %e _h to use "sbody else's c> to drive to s*ool4 ,s ,&rea wrote ? 9 h] notebook3 ,,,ms4 coco is a c> ?ief6,' ,!n we w5t ov] to ! (fice to 9t]view ,mrs4 ,patty1 ! s*ool secret>y4 ,%e told u a r1lly sad /ory ab ! "t h] dog di$ 9 an a3id5t :5 %e 0 a ll kid4 ,b ? is :at ,&rea wrote 9 h] notebook3 ,,,mrs4 patty,-dog kill]6,' #cc ,i slapp$ my h1d4 ,i 0 a ll #fj worri$ ab all ! dirt ,&rea 0 di7+ up4 8,i'm n sure we %d put ^? >ticles 9 ! pap]10 ,i told h] z we walk$ back to \r class4 8,we milo10 ,&rea sd4 8,mrs4 ,lilly told u to dig up "s dirt4 ,i'm j do+ :at %e told u to d40 ,&rea .1alw does :at gr[n-ups tell h] to d4 ,a gr[n-up cd tell h] to g jump (f a bridge1 & ,&rea wd d x4 ,:at is h] problem8 8,we %d probably 9t]view ,mr4 ,granite10 ,i su7e/$4 8,af all1 he is \r t1*]40 8,we don't ne$ to 9t]view ,mr4 ,granite10 -------------------------------#fa-#fb ,&rea sd4 8,i "k exactly :at to write ab hm40 ,%e wrote ? 9 h] notebook3 ,,,?ird-grade t1*] is an illegal ali56,' a#fb ,well1 at l1/ t "o 0 true4 ,mr4 ,granite .1is f ano!r planet4 -----------------------------------#fc #h ,front-,page ,news ,&rea & ,i did a bun* ( 9t]views ) ! gr[n-ups at \r s*ool4 ,:5 we got back to ! classroom1 ,ryan 0 ! only o!r kid :o 0 "!4 ,he sd t he & ,mi*ael didn't f9d any?+ 9t]e/+ :5 !y 7 go+ "? -----------------------------------#fd ! g>bage c1 s !y decid$ to split up & "w sep>ately4 ,&rea 0 all pr\d ( h]f = di7+ up dirt1 & %e %[$ ,mrs4 ,lilly h] notebook3 ,,,mrs4 yonk]s sets fires = fun6 ,,,vice pr9cipal poison$ def5se.s animals6 ,,,(fic] sp;e 0 9 jail = five ye>s6 ,,,ms4 coco is a c> ?ief6 #ce ,,,mrs4 patty,-dog kill]6 a#fd ,,,?ird-grade t1*] is an illegal ali56,' 8,^! >e t]rific /ories1 ,&rea60 ,mrs4 ,lilly told h]4 8,y & ,a4,j4 make a grt t1m60 -----------------------------------#fe 8.1,oooooh60 ,ryan sd4 8,a4,j4 & ,&rea make a grt t1m4 ,!y m/ 2 9 .1love60 ,&rea sd %e took a typ+ class af s*ool "<( c\rse">1 s %e 0 all[$ to type h] /ories 9to ! comput]4 ,%e _h t crazy look 9 h] eyes ! :ole "t4 ,"eybody else />t$ fil+ back 9to class4"9 8,did y dig up any gd dirt80 ,mrs4 ,lilly ask$ "ey"o4 ,? "o kid came 9 ) a bucket full ( dirt4 .1,r1l dirt4 8,n .1t k9d ( dirt60 we all yell$ at hm4 ,:at a dumbh1d4 "333333 "9,!y didn't actually come 9to class hold+ files4 ,my dad has a a#fe file 9 8 "w%op d[n ! base;t4 ,x wd 2 weird to file 9 class4 -----------------------------------#ff ,neil ! nude kid came runn+ 9to ! classroom4 ,he look$ all excit$4 8,did y dig up any dirt80 ,mrs4 ,lilly ask$ hm4 8,i put a tail on ,mr4 ,macky l y told me to10 ,neil sd4 8,i foll[$ hm >.d = an h\r1 & guess :at ,i cau ! wat] f.ta94 ,& !y 7 444 .1kiss+60 ,"eybody gasp$4 8,ewwww1 4gu/+60 me & ! guys & ,alexia w5t4 -----------------------------------#fg 8,wait a m9ute10 sd ,emily4 8,mr4 ,macky & ,mrs4 ,daisy >e .1m>ri$40 8,ewwww60 ,i sd4 8,t's ev5 .1m 4gu/+40 #cg 8,no1 x's a grt /ory60 ,&rea a#fg sd4 ,!n %e typ$ ? 9to ! comput]3 ,,,mr4 macky spott$ kiss+ m>ri$ woman6,' 8,i love x60 sd ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,put t on ! front page6 ,:at else h y kids got80 8,emily & ,i snuck 9to ! t1*]s' l\nge10 sd ,alexia4 -----------------------------------#fh 8,:at did y f9d 9 "!80 ask$ ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,any gd dirt80 8,did y see ! hot tub80 ,i ask$4 8,no1 no?+ v excit+10 ,emily sd4 8,"! 7 j a bun* ( t1*]s eat+ lun*40 8,t's all80 ask$ ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,t's n a /ory40 8,y1h1 x 0 r1lly bor+10 ,alexia sd4 8,! mo/ excit+ ?+ t happ5$ 0 t ,miss ,laney spill$ "s apple juice & _h to cl1n x up40 ,&rea sudd5ly look$ up f ! comput] scre5 ) ^? crazy eyes ( h]s4 8,:at80 %e ask$4 8,did y say ,miss a#fh ,laney spill$ juice8 ,t's a grt -----------------------------------#fi human 9t]e/ /ory60 ,!n %e typ$ ? 9to ! comput]3 ,,,spee* t1*] has a dr9k+ problem,' 8,t's .1g5ius60 sd ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,y >e a .1grt report]1 ,&rea60 8,?ank y60 ,&rea _h a big1 crazy-ey$ smile on -----------------------------------#gj h] face1 l %e j won ! ,no ,bell ,prize or "s?+4"9 ,%e j .1loves x :5 gr[n-ups tell h] h[ wond];l %e is4 8,hey10 ,neil ! nude kid sudd5ly sd1 8":'s ,mi*ael80 ,we all look$ >.d4 ,"eybody 0 back 9 ! classroom except = ,mi*ael4 8,yes1 ": .1is ,mi*ael80 ask$ ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,! la/ "t ,i saw hm10 ,ryan sd1 8he 0 climb+ 9to ! ,dump/] 9 ! playgr.d4 ,he sd he 0 look+ = a scoop40 #ci "333333 a#gj "9,?at's a prize !y give \ to p :o don't h bells4 -----------------------------------#ga #i ,! ,scoop ( ! ,c5tury6 ,we didn't wait >.d = ,mi*ael to come back to class4 ,we _h a newspap] to f9i%4 ,&rea typ$ h] /ories 9to ! comput]4 ,mrs4 ,lilly us$ a laptop comput] to look up photos we cd use4 ,%e f.d a -----------------------------------#gb picture ( ,elvis ,presley & made x look l he 0 /&+ next to ,ms4 ,la,grange4 ,!n %e f.d a picture ( ,(fic] ,sp;e & drew b>s 9 front ( 8 face to make x look l he 0 9 jail4 ,%e cut \ a picture ( ,mrs4 ,yonk]s smil+ & put x 9 front ( a picture ( a h\se t 0 burn+ d[n4 ,mrs4 ,lilly %[$ u h[ to put ! photos 9to \r classroom comput]1 & ,&rea wrote cap;ns "u !m3 a#gb @.<,picture@.> ,ms4 ,la,grange _h an ,elvis si ,(fic] ,sp;e 2h b>s4 @.<,picture@.> ,:5 %e's n t1*+1 ,mrs4 ,yonk]s 5joys sett+ fires4 ,! front page ( .7,! ,ella ,m5try ,s5try.' look$ grt4 8,i say ? pap] is d"o10 sd ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,let's pr9t x60 -----------------------------------#gd ,&rea hit ! ,,pr9t button1 & ! pr9t] />t$ pr9t+4 ,2c t's :at pr9t]s d4 ,b y'll n"e 2lieve :o ran 9to ! door at t mo;t6 ,nobody4 ,:y wd any"o run 9to a door8 ,t wd hurt4 ,b y'll n"e 2lieve :o ran 9to ! .1doorway4 ,x 0 ,mi*ael6 ,he 0 we>+ 8 backpack1 & he 0 all \ ( br1?4 -----------------------------------#ge 8,did y get a scoop80 ,mrs4 ,lilly ask$ hm4 #da 8,i got ! be/ scoop 9 ! a#ge hi/ory ( ! _w60 ,mi*ael repli$4 8,,,/op ! presses6,'0 %\t$ ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,mi*ael has a scoop60 ,&rea /opp$ ! pr9t]4 ,we all look$ at ,mi*ael4 ,n[1 ,i "k :at y're ?9k+4 ,y're ?9k+ ! same ?+ ,i 0 ?9k+4 ,y're ?9k+ t ,mi*ael pull$ a pla/ic scoop \ ( 8 backpack4 ,y're ?9k+ t we all yell$ at hm1 8,n .1t k9d ( scoop60 ,b ,mi*ael .1didn't pull a scoop \ ( 8 backpack4 ,s nah-nah-nah boo-boo -----------------------------------#gf on y4 8,:at did y f9d \1 ,mi*ael80 ask$ ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,mr4 ,klutz 444 doesn't we> "upants60 %\t$ ,mi*ael4 ,"eybody gasp$6 ,we 7 all fr1k+ \6 8,no60 %\t$ ,alexia4 8,x c't 2 true60 %\t$ ,neil ! nude kid4 8,? is ! scoop ( ! c5tury60 %\t$ ,&rea4 8,wait a m9ute10 sd ,mrs4 a#gf ,lilly4 8,calm d[n1 "ey"o4 ,we h to make sure we h \r facts /rai "upants80 8,uh1 n exactly10 ,mi*ael sd4 8,b ,i don't h any pro( t he .1does we> "upants ei4 ,s ,i figure "!'s a fifty-fifty *.e t ,mr4 ,klutz doesn't we> "upants40 ,we all look$ at ,mrs4 ,lilly4 ,%e 0 a gr[n-up1 s ! deci.n wd 2 up to h]4 8,hmmm10 %e sd4 8,fifty-fifty1 eh8 ,well1 t's gd 5 = me4 ,&rea1 put t on page two60 ,&rea typ$ ? 9to ! comput]3 ,,,mr4 klutz doesn't we> "upants6,' #dc #aj #gh ,/op ! ,presses6 ,f9ally1 .7,! ,ella ,m5try ,s5try.' 0 f9i%$1 & we 7 r1dy to pr9t x4 ,mrs4 ,lilly told u we _h all d"o a grt job4 8,c ,i pr9t \ "s extra copies s we c take ! newspap] home & %[ x to \r p>5ts80 ask$ ,&rea4 -----------------------------------#gi 8,( c\rse60 sd ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,we'll pr9t a copy = "ey"o 9 ! class40 ,&rea hit ! ,,pr9t button ag1 & ! pr9t] />t$ pr9t+ a bun* ( copies ( .7,! ,ella ,m5try ,s5try.'4 ,b y'll n"e 2lieve 9 a million hundr$ ye>s :o came walk+ 9to ! door at t mo;t4 ,nobody4 ,x wd hurt if y walk$ 9to a door4 ,i ?"\ y wd "k t by n[4 ,b y'll n"e 2lieve :o pok$ 8 h1d 9 ! door4 ,nobody6 ,:y wd any"o 9 _! "r m9d want to poke _! h1d 9 a door8 ,t wd hurt too4 ,b y'll n"e 2lieve :o came walk+ 9to \r classroom4 #hj ,x 0 ,mr4 ,klutz6 8,i j want$ to see h[ y kids 7 mak+ \10 he sd4 8,ewwwwwwww1 4gu/+60 we all %\t$4 8,we're n mak+ \40 8,no1 ,i m1n1 h[ is yr newspap] go+80 ask$ ,mr4 ,klutz4 8,see = yrf10 ,mrs4 ,lilly sd z %e took a copy \ ( ! pr9t] & h&$ x to ,mr4 ,klutz4 ,z he r1d ! front page ( \r pap]1 8 eyes bu7$ \ & 8 jaw dropp$ op54 ,he 0 :ite z a e y okay1 ,mr4 ,klutz80 ,i ask$ hm4 8,,,/op ! presses6,'0 he yell$4 -----------------------------------#ha 8,(fic] ,sp;e 0 9 jail8 ,mrs4 ,yonk]s sets build+s on fire8 ,mr4 ,dock] b1ts 8 wife8 ,mrs4 ,patty kills dogs8 ,y c't pr9t ? /uff60 8,:y n80 ask$ ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,^? >e -----------------------------------#hb grt human 9t]e/ /ories40 #de 8,!y're a bun* ( lies60 ,mr4 a#hb ,klutz sd4 ,he 0 r1lly mad4 8,>e y call+ u li>s80 ask$ ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,if ! %oe fits1 we> x60 sd ,mr4 ,klutz4 8,:at d %oes h to d ) any?+80 ,i ask$1 b "eybody ignor$ me4 8,": did y get ? 9=ma;n80 dem&$ ,mr4 ,klutz4 8,i'm sorry10 ,mrs4 ,lilly told hm1 8b we _c rev1l \r s\rces40 ,mr4 ,klutz turn$ to page two ( \r pap] & let \ a scr1m4 ,i guess he m/ h r1d ! /ory ab hmf4 -----------------------------------#hc ,he 0 fr1k+ \4 8,i don't we> "upants80 ,mr4 ,klutz yell$4 ,"eybody />t$ gi7l+ 2c ,mr4 ,klutz j admitt$ \ l\d t he didn't we> "upants4 8,h[ cd y possibly "k :at ,i we> or don't we> "u my clo!s80 ,mr4 ,klutz dem&$4 8,we only pr9t ! facts10 sd ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,we _h no pro( t y we> a#hc "upants1 s we _h no *oice b to assume y don't40 8,t's ridicul\s60 %\t$ ,mr4 ,klutz4 8,i mo/ c]ta9ly .1d we> "upants1 & ,i c prove x40 -----------------------------------#hd ,) t1 ,mr4 ,klutz pull$ d[n 8 pants4 8,,eeeeek60 ,mrs4 ,lilly scr1m$4 8,*n6 ,don't look60 ,b we all look$ anyway4 ,"u 8 pants1 ,mr4 ,klutz 0 we>+ p9k box] %orts ) r$ he>ts on !m4 ,x 0 hil>i\s4 ,y %d h be5 "!4 8,yr "upants >e adorable1 ,mr4 ,klutz10 sd ,alexia4 ,x 0 a r1l ,kodak mo;t4 ,s ,&rea qkly pick$ up ,mrs4 ,lilly's cam]a & snapp$ a picture ( ,mr4 ,klutz ) 8 pants d[n4 8,we c use ? 9 ! .1next $i;n ( .7,! ,ella ,m5try ,s5try.'60 ,&rea sd4 -----------------------------------#he 8,"! w .12 no next $i;n ( .7,! ,ella ,m5try ,s5try.'60 ,mr4 ,klutz #dg %\t$4 8,? newspap] is,-0 a#he ,b he didn't get ! *.e to f9i% 8 s5t;e1 2c y'll n"e 2lieve -----------------------------------#hf 9 a million hundr$ ye>s :o came runn+ 9to ! classroom at t mo;t4 ,i'm n go+ to tell y4 ,okay1 okay1 ,i'll tell y4 ,b y h to r1d ! next *apt] f/4 ,s nah-nah-nah boo-boo on y4 -----------------------------------#hg #aa ,fre$om ( ! ,press ,! p]son :o came runn+ 9to ! classroom at t mo;t 0 ,dr4 ,c>bles1 ! presid5t ( ! ,bo>d ( ,$uca;n6 ,he 0 ! "o :o came up ) ! idea ( ,c>e] ,"d 9 ! f/ place4 8,klutz60 he %\t$4 8,:y >e y -----------------------------------#hh /&+ "! ) yr pants d[n80 8,,,i 444 i 444 i,' 0 j prov+ to ! *n t ,i we> "upants10 ,mr4 ,klutz expla9$4 8,! *n >e "h to le>n ab r1d+1 a#hh writ+1 & >i?metic10 yell$ -----------------------------------#hi ,dr4 ,c>bles4 8,!y're n "h to le>n ab yr "uwe>40 8,b 444 b 444 b 4440 ,we all />t$ gi7l+ 2c ,mr4 ,klutz kept say+ 8b10 : s.ds j l 8butt02 b y c't say 8butt0 9 s*ool4 ,nobody "ks :y4 8,p>ad+ >.d 9 yr "upants is n "p ( yr job descrip;n1 ,klutz60 sd ,dr4 ,c>bles4 8,y're fir$60 ,"eybody gasp$4 ,t's :5 a bun* ( ! t1*]s came runn+ 9to ! room4 8,we he>d t ! /ud5ts >e writ+ m1n /ories ab u 9 ! s*ool pap]10 %\t$ ,mr4 ,macky4 8,is ? true80 -----------------------------------#ij 8,yes1 x's true60 ,mr4 ,klutz sd1 wav+ >.d a copy ( .7,! ,ella ,m5try ,s5try.'4 8,look at ?6 ,8,mrs4 ,patty,-,dog ,kill]6,0 ,8,vice ,pr9cipal ,poison$ ,def5se.s ,animals6,00 #di 8,y c't pr9t t g>bage60 %\t$ a#ij ,ms4 ,coco4 8,sure we c10 sd ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,didn't -----------------------------------#ia y "e he> ( fre$om ( ! press8 ,x's 9 ! ,f/ ,am5d;t40 8,well1 ,i'm ! presid5t ( ! ,bo>d ( ,$uca;n10 sd ,dr4 ,c>bles z he gra2$ all ! pap]s \ ( ! pr9t]1 8& :at ,i say goes4 ,i'm %utt+ d[n .7,! ,ella ,m5try ,s5try.' "r n[60 ,"eybody gasp$4 -----------------------------------#ib 8,t's n fair60 ,ryan %\t$4 8,x's \r pap]4 ,y c't %ut x d[n60 8,oh yes1 ,i c60 ,dr4 ,c>bles sd4 8,& "!'s no?+ y c d ab x4 ,nobody w .1"e r1d ? tra%60 ,"eybody 0 r1lly upset4 ,b ,mrs4 ,lilly _h a ll smile on h] face4 8,i'm sorry to tell y ?10 %e sd quietly1 8b p >e .1alr r1d+ .7,! ,ella ,m5try ,s5try.'40 8,:at860 %\t$ ,dr4 ,c>bles z he wav$ ! pap]s 9 ! air4 8,h[ c anybody a#ib r1d x if ,i h all ! pages80 8,2c !y're r1d+ ! onl9e $i;n10 ,mrs4 ,lilly told hm4 8.7,! ,ella ,m5try ,s5try.' is on ! 9t]net4 ,i s5t x -----------------------------------#ic to ,wiki,l1ks4 ,?\s&s ( p >e probably r1d+ x "r n[40 8,oh no60 %\t$ ,mr4 ,klutz4 8,"eybody is go+ to ?9k ,i h two wives1 & t ,i don't we> "upants60 8,p >e go+ to say ,i b1t my wife60 %\t$ ,mr4 ,dock]4 8,!y'll say ,i'm a drunk60 %\t$ ,miss ,laney4 8,& t ,i kill def5se.s animals10 %\t$ ,mrs4 ,jafee4 ,sudd5ly1 "! 0 a sir5 \tside4 ,i look$ \ ! w9d[4 ,a police c> pull$ up to ! s*ool1 & two cops got \4 ,a m9ute lat] !y 7 9 \r classroom4 8,: "o ( y is ! pr9cipal ( -----------------------------------#id ? s*ool80 "o ( ! policem5 ask$4 8,i am10 sd ,mr4 ,klutz4 #ea 8,well1 y're "u >re/10 sd ! a#id policeman4 8,x's ag/ ! law to h m ?an "o wife40 8,b 444 b 444 b 444 ? is all a big mi/ake1 ,(fic]10 ,mr4 ,klutz tri$ to expla94 8,i don't h,-0 8,y h ! "r to rema9 sil5t10 9t]rupt$ ! policeman z he got \ a pair ( h&cu6s4 8,s 2 quiet4 ,& pull up yr pants40 ,! policeman h&cu6$ ,mr4 ,klutz & l$ hm away4 ,! o!r policeman took a pad \ ( 8 pocket4 8,okay1 we al ne$ to >re/ ! guy -----------------------------------#ie :o b1ts 8 wife1 ! lady :o burns d[n h\ses1 ! c> ?ief1 &1 uh1 :o's ! dog kill]80 he ask$4 8,t wd 2 me10 sd ,mrs4 ,patty1 rais+ h] h&4 8,! guy :o kisses m>ri$ wom5 c /ay10 sd ! policeman1 8& s c ! illegal ali5 & ! lady :o ?9ks %e sees ,elvis 9 s\p b[ls4 ,b we're keep+ an eye on y ?ree40 #if ,he put h&cu6s on ,mr4 ,dock]1 ,mrs4 ,yonk]s1 ,ms4 ,coco1 & ,mrs4 ,patty4 ,!n he l$ !m \ ! doorway4 ,x 0 cool6 ,we got to see x live & 9 p]son4 ,nobody sd any?+ = a :ile af ! police c> drove away4 ,!n ,mrs4 ,lilly /ood up & put h] tr5* coat on4 8,well1 my "w is d"o "h10 %e sd4 8,y c ?ank me lat]4 ,= n[1 ,i h to g40 8,d y h to g10 ,i ask$1 8or d y h to .1g80 8,i m1n1 l1ve10 sd ,mrs4 ,lilly4 8,y don't ne$ to use l1ves10 ,i told h]4 8,"!'s toilet pap] 9 ! ba?room40 -----------------------------------#ig ,dr4 ,c>bles & j ab all ! o!r gr[n-ups left ! classroom af t4 ,! only "o :o 0 / "! 0 ,mr4 ,granite4 8,okay10 sd ,mr4 ,granite1 8maybe we c f9ally d \r ma? lesson n[4 ,turn to -----------------------------------#ih page tw5ty-?ree 9 yr,-0 ,he n"e got ! *.e to f9i% 8 s5t;e1 2c at t mo;t a l\d bell rang4 #ec .1,brrrrrrriiiii9nnnnnnn77gg6 a#ih ,x 0 ?ree o'clock6 ,"t to g home6 ,yay6 ,no ma?6 ,:5 ,i got home1 my mom ask$ me :at happ5$ at s*ool dur+ ! "d4 8,no?+10 ,i said4"9 "333333 "9,any "t yr p>5ts ask :at happ5$ at s*ool dur+ ! "d1 y %d alw say 8,no?+40 ,t's ! f/ rule ( 2+ a kid4 -----------------------------------#ii #ab ,lies6 ,all ,lies6 ,i didn't "k if s*ool wd 2 op5 on ,mon"d1 2c ,mr4 ,klutz & half ! t1*]s 7 9 jail4 ,b :5 ,i got to s*ool1 ! front door 0 op51 & "! 7 a bun* ( sub/itute t1*]s 9 ! halls4 ----------------------------------#ajj ,mo/ ( ! kids 7 alr 9 class :5 ,i got "!4 ,i put my /uff 9 my cu2y & sat d[n4"9 ,& y'll n"e 2lieve :o walk$ 9to ! door at t mo;t4 ,x 0 ,mayor ,hu2le1 :o is l a#ajj ! k+ ( ! :ole t[n6 ,he walk$ "r 9to ! door6 8,\*60 ,mayor ,hu2le sd4 8,t hurts60 8,w y 2 \r t1*] td1 ,mayor80 ask$ ,&rea1 :o n"e misses ! *.e to br[nnose a gr[n-up4 8,yes10 ,mayor ,hu2le sd1 8we ran \ ( sub/itute t1*]s1 s ,i'm fill+ 9 td40 "333333 "9,but n 9 my cu2y4 ,t wd 2 weird4 ----------------------------------#aja 8,is x true t y 7 go+ to ! ba?room :5 a tree fell on yr h\se80 ,alexia ask$ ! mayor4 8,yes1 ,i 0 trapp$ 9 "! = _m h\rs40 8,well1 at l1/ y _h a ba?room h&y10 ,i sd4 ,! mayor op5$ up 8 briefcase & pull$ \ "s pap]s4 ,he pass$ "o to ea* ( u4 8,! t1*]s 7 9spir$ by y ----------------------------------#ajb kids10 ,mayor ,hu2le sd4 8,ov] ! week5d1 !y made a ll newspap] j l yrs4 ,i ?"\ y mie "s grt human 9t]e/ a#ajb /ories 9 "h40 ,i look$ at ! newspap]4 ,? is :at ! top h1dl9e sd3 ,a4,j4 ,picks ,nose1 ,eats ,x6 8,ewwwwwwwww1 4gu/+60 ,neil ! nude kid %\t$4 8,hey1 ,a4,j410 sd ,mi*ael4 8,did y r1lly eat yr nose80 8,no60 ,i %\t$4 ,i want$ to g run away to ,ant>ctica & live ) ! p5gu9s4 ,!n ,i look$ at ! o!r h1dl9es on ! page3 ,mi*ael ,c't ,tie ,8 ,[n ,%oes6 ----------------------------------#ajc ,ryan ,w ,eat ,any?+,-,ev5 ,/uff t isn't ,food6 ,"u ,8 ,clo!s1 ,neil ,is ,nude6 ,a4,j4 & ,alexia3 ,tw9s ,sep>at$ at ,bir?6 ,&rea ,fails ,spell+ ,te/6 a#ajc ,"eybody 0 yell+ & scr1m+ & fr1k+ \4 ,& nobody 0 m upset ?an ,&rea4 8,t's a lie60 %e %\t$4 8,i n"e got less ?an an ,a plus on any te/ 9 my life60 8,! t1*]s c't pr9t ^! lies ab u60 %\t$ ,neil ! nude kid4 8,sure !y c10 sd ,mayor ,hu2le4 8,did y "e he> ( fre$om ( ! press80 8,t's n fair60 we all %\t$4 ,at t mo;t an ann\nce;t came ----------------------------------#ajd ov] ! l\dsp1k]4 ,we _h to report to ! all-purpose room = an assembly4 8,x's "t to g10 sd ,mayor ,hu2le4 8,is x "t to g10 ,i ask$1 8or is x "t to .1g80 8,x's "t to g10 sd ,mayor ,hu2le4 ----------------------------------#aje 8,:at if we don't h to g80 ask$ ,ryan4 8,we .1all h to g10 sd ,mayor ,hu2le4 8,at ! same "t80 ask$ ,mi*ael4 #eg 8,i don't h to g10 ,i sd4 a#aje 8,me nei10 sd ,alexia4 8,i j w5t a few m9utes ago10 sd ,emily4 8,i'll g lat]10 sd ,neil ! nude kid4 ,well1 t's pretty m* :at happ5$4 ,maybe ! t1*]s w get \ ( jail soon4 ,maybe we'll publi% ano!r $i;n ( .7,! ,ella ,m5try ,s5try.'4 ,maybe ,mrs4 ,lilly w /op gra2+ p's eyeballs4 ,maybe ,tony ,eagle w /op runn+ ----------------------------------#ajf 9to doors4 ,maybe !y'll get t tree \ ( ,mayor ,hu2le's ba?room4 ,maybe ,&rea w explode4 ,maybe ,mr4 ,klutz w /op pull+ 8 pants d[n 9 s*ool4 ,maybe we'll all get 9vit$ to "o ( ,mrs4 ,yonk]s's b>becues4 ,maybe ,mr4 ,macky w /op kiss+ 8 wife 9 public4 ,maybe "eybody w /op hav+ to g all ! "t4 ,maybe we'll f9ally get "? page tw5ty-?ree 9 \r ma? books4 ,b x won't 2 easy6 @.<,! ,5d@.>